Apple Watch won’t be worth its weight in gold

I’m not saying that the Apple Watch isn’t innovative, or that people won’t buy it. I know too many critics who were burned when they said the same thing about the iPad a few years ago.

If nothing else, the fact that Pebble’s “Pebble Time” Kickstarter campaign spiked to a $16,000 hourly yield after the Apple Watch was announced is proof enough for me that there is a strong consumer appetite for smartwatches.

(Kārlis Dambrāns/Flickr Commons)

(Kārlis Dambrāns/Flickr Commons)

However, given the same money it costs to buy an Apple Watch, are there not better and more useful things we could be putting that money towards?

I mean, is there really a lot that smartwatches offer that smartphones don’t? (That is, aside from enabling us to spam the heck out of Shazam on roadtrips and nights out on the town?)

Okay, fine. There is a legit case to be made. If you’re an athlete of any kind, that Apple Watch is basically a Fitbit or Nike+ FuelBand on steroids. If that’s your cup of tea, go ahead and track analytics and stuff about yourself.

And yes, there are also arguments to be made about having

Apple Pay on your wrist, making use of the Apple Watch’s time management alerts, or simply wanting to be an early adopter of something new and exciting.

That’s all fine. I just fear that “smart” is beginning to become a buzzword of sorts.

The smartphone was an innovative concept because it was the first piece of tech to give us on- the-fly and constant access to a full-fledged computer. We had laptops before, but we still had to be sedentary to use them. The birth of smartphones meant that we could now apply computers to problems that we would only encounter on the go, like finding last minute directions to an important destination.

But it seems everything “smart” that came after the smartphone only duplicates or extends the smartphone’s functionality – save for a few niche scenarios, like surgeons using Google Glass to access vital info while they operate on patients.

In a world where we already complain we don’t have enough “me time” in the day, and where we are constantly bombarded with emails and social media updates, is an extension to our smartphones really warranted?

I’ll let you decide for yourself, as long as we can agree on one thing: Apple Watch Edition is the dumbest concept (and name for a product) ever.

For those who don’t know (a.k.a. have been living under a rock), the Watch Edition is Apple’s high-end line of 18-karat gold watches that will range from $13,000 to $22,000 in Canada, according to the online Apple Store.

Anybody who spends $22,000 on an Apple Watch is a complete chump, especially since, unlike a Rolex, which will still be stylish and valuable decades from now, an Apple Watch will surely become obsolete in the next few years when Apple Watch 2 drops.